Another Brother

I just gained my second brother-in-law in two weeks, and I couldn't be happier.  My big sister is now a married woman off on her honeymoon having a blast with her new husband.

The wedding itself will definitely be a memorable one to all who attended, and I hope now that the nerves have shaken off and we've had our fill of champagne, we can all look back and laugh... I know I'm already starting to crack a smile. 

Starting with the ceremony, which was performed by one of those priests who is the reason so many people have turned away from the Catholic church.  Besides yelling at the congregation to stand long before the bridal march, forgetting to pronounce them man and wife, and forgetting the kiss until the very end "Simon says kiss", this man actually threw a centipede at the bride.  No, it's not a new custom, it's a dirty old man who saw a bug crawling on his sleeve when he raised his arm to bless them, and shook it off so that it scampered underneath the bridal gown.  The bride held her composure beautifully, and a few moments later during the kiss of peace I grabbed the gown and shook it furiously to make sure only the groom would be touching that garter (which later ended up on my dad's head, but that's a different story altogether!).  My other sister soon pointed out that the bug was still up at the alter, and we were safe.

Next, on the ride to the reception site (thankfully the floodwaters from the previous day had receded), my own advice to only have champagne and light colored beer (Stella) in the limo paid off for, well, myself!  The driver took off rather quickly and I slid off the seat splashing champagne all over the gorgeous white clouds of bridal gown.  Somehow, everything turned out ok and it all wiped off, but boy I was nervous that I'd ruined something!

Cut to the reception, where the DJ had a slip of the tongue and actually said the wrong name for the bride.  This, coupled with a groomsman falling off the head table platform (and taking part of the table with him), was just the icing on the cake. - which was delicious, and I don't think anybody but us noticed when the flowers fell down the side causing those imperfections in the icing! 

Despite all of this, my sister had a beautiful day, an unforgettable reception - who else busts into 'My Sharona' during the middle of 'Daddy's little girl'?   Everyone ate fabulous food, danced until their feet hurt, and drank until they couldn't remember anything (or was that just me?).  And if they didn't get enough beer, they just grabbed enough at last call to hide in the bushes until later :)

And my apologies to anyone who attended at the length of my matron of honor speech, I hope I didn't cut into too much dancing time!

T, the last thing you said to me 5 years ago when you stood in this spot and I yours was “I hope someday I’ll find someone who can make me as happy as M makes you”. Well, little did we know that he was sitting a few feet away and that your "someday" would come immediately.


I didn’t pay much attention that night to T and J hanging out that night, but a couple days later, as my cell phone picked up reception while the cruise ship was rolling into port in St Thomas, it starting beeping like crazy with a text message. Oh - did I mention it was the crack of dawn on my Honeymoon??? So - you may want to put your phone on silent next week ;)

T’s text was something to the effect of – “I know I had it but I lost it – what was jeremy’s phone number again?” Excited and elated that she wanted to see him, I rushed to find a computer and email her. When I logged in, I found an email “nevermind that text I sent you last night, HE called ME. We went out for happy hour, which turned into 6 happy hours.”

After hearing that, I spent much of the remainder of the week fantasizing about giving this very speech. So after 5 years of wishing and hoping, here we are!

When I first met Jeremy, he was an 18 year old kid wearing a big black hoodie, fresh and stinky from a Phish concert and visiting M at school. Louis, as his friends cal him, soon became a staple of my hazleton visits. He'd have the crowd at Hoops in hysterics over his latest Chappelle impression. When the late would become early morning, J's sweet and caring side woud take over as he would invite us back to his parents house so he could cook up some 3am grilled cheese sandwiches.

It was these nights I knew J would make someone very happy someday.

T was always more than just a sister to me. Growing up, I hero-worshipped her, trying to imitate everything she did without her seeing me, because man did it piss her off! Eventually I found myself but a little part of me looking up to her always remained. When we became closer, and she started hanging out with my friends, they would be like "omg, we get to hang out with T N! she is SO cool". I felt proud and even a bit smug, thinking "yes, that's MY sister".

I knew it would take someone very special to deserve you.

When fate stepped in five years ago and brought you two together, the change I saw in each of you was unmistakeable. J - besides the fun-loving sweetie that I've always known, you now seemed complete, confident, and utterly happy. T - besides the successful, independent trendsetter I adore, you have become fulfilled, softer, and more romantic. When you talk about J, it's written all over your face and is even evident in your voice that you are completely in love.


They always say that a girl should marry someone just like her father. Beside my dad, J is the only man I know who can be as meticulous about his car one second and slide across the dance floor on his knees the next. J, you have always been like a brother to me, now I am happy it's been made official.

I wish you two all the love and happiness in the world, I love you guys.