To the Big Elementary School Guy

This was written last week during one of my insomnia nights worrying about my

Dear Gobbles,

We are less than a week before first grade begins and I'm alternating between excitement and tears at the thought of you growing up and hitting the school on your own. Kindergarten was a nice transition in that I didn't see your teacher every day anyway since you took the van, but I still got my Friday face time with her just to see how you were. But this will be so much different, this is the big time.

Your kindergarten graduation was so emotional for me, I think because we've spent 6 years with some of these families, our village, and we've all helped each other through crazy times. I'm lucky that some will stick around at least through your sister leaving pre-k with the siblings, but at the same time so sad that the relationships will change from daily interactions.

You, however, rocked your Kindergarten year and the graduation. You learned to read and went beyond in math. You stuck tight with your buddies but even branched out to some new friends, and came out of school with a confidence that only 5th year seniors have. You've done your summer reading, but for that pesky paragraph you have to write, probably more mommy's procrastination than yours. Even your reading comprehension is coming along- we're halfway through the 2nd Harry Potter book and each time we pick it back up you are able to recall the pertinent details of the previous chapter. You also try to make predictions on what's going to happen and explain why. Since we know the spoilers Daddy and I just let you go with your theories until they're revealed in the reading.

This summer I've seen your transition from a little boy into a big boy. You help out with your chores (although sometimes begrudgingly), you fly across the monkey bars with the ease of a ninja, and you have free reign at the pool to swim, dive, tread, do anything you want and I am confident that you are totally fine. You keep reminding you that one time I mentioned you should get an allowance when you start first grade.  You've started watching Big Brother with me and actually pay attention to what is going on and who is "on the block" (I'm so sorry for dragging you into the dark side of reality t.v.). And speaking of the dark side, you're not phased by and of the horrors in and Star Wars, actually cheer when Kylo Ren kills Han Solo (should I be worried?), and for the 2nd Halloween in a row want to be a bad guy with a lightsaber.

Last weekend, we were at the beach, and the third and final day the water was particularly calm yer frigid. After I declared myself spent in the water (it literally took my breath away it was so cold), you said, "that's fine mom, I can float by myself". And you took your boogie board and did just that. I sat in my chair about a hundred yards from the waters edge and watched, half proud, half petrified. Not soon after, you were joined by a girl who introduced herself the day before (9 years old!) and spend the morning riding waves with her. When I finally came to get you out of the water there was another little boy who you'd made friends with too chatting you up the whole way up the beach. We got home that night and Daddy asked how the beach was (he'd been home with the dogs), and your sister in a sing-songy voice started talking about your girrrrlllfriend. I've never see you so embarrassed. It seems that was a little tidbit you wanted to keep to yourself. I can't believe you are already at an age that you don't want to tell us everything!

Well buddy, you're starting a new phase in your life, and at times it may not be as easy as school has been. I'm not concerned at all about you academically, I know you'll do great if you just keep working hard and not rush through everything- you're very smart, but you have to pay attention to what you're doing. The friendships you've had for so many years may change, and the way you interact with each other in a real school environment will be different. It's the big time now, and you're back to being one of the little guys. Just be confident in yourself and don't take to heart what anyone says. I know I know easier said than done.

I'm so proud of you, I'm a little anxious for you, I'm sad that you're growing up, I'm eager for you to learn, and most of all I'm excited for your new adventure! I love you so much Gobbles!

Love,
Mom

P.S.  Well we survived our first day yesterday, and I have to admit, although you've been in school for 6 years now, I spent more time wondering what you were up to yesterday than I did the whole time you were at daycare.  I don't know why, because you did incredibly.  You had your boys with you and you branched out and introduced yourself.  You inserted yourself into a conversation to defend someone, and you loved music class and recess.  I can't wait to go to back to school night and find out what everything is all about.  Thanks for being a good kid, buddy!

Of Late

We're in an interesting place right now, this little family of ours.  Digging ourselves out of a really rough winter, but still living day to day in this strange sort of limbo.

I can't seem to get pregnant again, and it's very frustrating.  I've even resorted to joining a "biggest loser" competition among neighbors in an effort to lose the previous "baby weight" and make myself healthier all in hopes of regaining everything I lost slow and steady over a joyous 9 month course.  It lasted 40 days and ended this past Friday.  I lost a legitimate 18 lbs in the first 5 weeks and an additional 7 of water with a fine regiment of dehydration and sweatsuit exercise yielding me a 2nd place finish (out of 32, mostly men) of 13.42% loss.  I've celebrated by reconsuming junk food and re-attaining all of the water weight over just 3 days.  It was fun while it lasted though, giving me something else to hyperfocus on and compete.  I'm hoping to keep on the loss train for awhile but of course I have to stop with the celebratory sugar first.

Hubs has been at his job for six months now, but it feels like an eternity.  The new normal is half the time he is not home for dinner or bedtime at all, and the other half I'm taking all of my stress out on him because I'm the bad cop every weekday night screaming about homework and nightly reading that needs done.  Hopefully summer brings an easier routine.

Worst of all, our beloved Spoonsie bear has cancer, and though the multiple vacations' worth of money we've spent on her treatment has made every extra day we get with her worth it, the dread of losing her tomorrow or 6 months from now has become a permanent fixture in the back of our heads.  We're working on loving her a little extra every day and making sure the kids are getting all the snuggles in the can with her.  Praying she is healthy enough to come on a little doggie vacation we have planned for June.

The kids.  They've been taking all of this in stride.  They talk about Spoons "going to Heaven soon" in a matter-of-fact way since they've had to deal with losing both the baby in my belly and their great grandmother in short history.  As the same time Gobbles looks at her with such love that I know his life will never be the same once she is gone.  They lament about how they miss their daddy when he is at work or they miss me when I'm traveling, but every night when we do our thankfuls the Lobster gushes how she is thankful that she has the best family ever and our hearts are restored before calling it a day.  They are growing up so quickly.

Gobbles is almost finished Kindergarten, still loving Star Wars with every fiber of his being, and still hanging out with his best buddies.  He's become a little ninja warrior climbing on everything, trees, poles, monkey bars, ANYTHING that is up high that he can get his hands on.  The kid's upper body strength is amazing and the fear and caution he once showed when he was little is long gone.  He's reading now too, like word by word plodding through books.  Not on his own doing, as he is not exactly enthusiastic about it, but he does what he is assigned.  Math; however, is quite the opposite.  He does not have to be pushed or prodded at all.  In fact, it's quite the opposite - "Mom, can you give me some hard math problems while you're cooking please?  just shout them out and I'll figure them out."  Last week he was quite proud of himself for constructing the best sphere out of legos and winning the teacher's dollar prize.   He's been through tennis in the fall, soccer in the winter, and is now onto Tball in the spring, loving each of them.  We got the swimming crash lessons wrapped up last week with both kids getting excellent progress reports and cleared to move up a step to intermediate swimmer and advanced beginner.  Since we just don't have the kind of time as a dual working family to put Gobbles on the swim team, that was probably the last of his lessons for now and the future, as he now knows how to swim freestyle properly.

The Lobster, my girl, she's navigating the world of pre-K, having moved up in February after turning four.  She's in a different place than her brother was when he moved up, with her two best buds in class being boys, waiting for her bffs to turn and move up.  Her very close girl, V, the one she's been partners in crime with day in and out, recently moved away and the Lobster is not taking it very well.  The other girls in the class are all five and on their way to high school, with a cool exclusiveness that didn't seem to exist before.  I'm hoping the Lobster lets it roll off of her until the sweeter girls move up, although from the phone call I got today- biting a friend who tried to mess with her man- I think we have a long way to go.  Academically, the Lobster is where we expect, though without the need to show it off like her brother.  She'll randomly come out with correct math facts or memory recall that surprises us.  This kid is definitely underestimated and I know she'll surprise us more in the future.  She's currently obsessed with her own fashion style, earrings, chapstick, and headbands, and is working hard for her first dance recital.  When she's not being the girliest of girls she's kicking butt on the soccer field or farting and blaming Daddy, all while pissing herself with laughter.

In the past few weeks (besides the monotany of running around and sports and birthday parties galore- they still haven't slowed these social butterfly kids!), we've gotten to have some good family time.  For Mothers' Day the kids (with just a little bit of hubs' help, just a little he insists) made me a gorgeous flower planter to adorn the corner of the sunporch opposite last years' herb garden.  Gobbles was so proud and was bursting by the time they got the chance to show it with me.  The Lobster had been making "happy Mothers Day" cards for weeks leading up to the day.  Hubs made my family and I dinner that coincided nicely with the aforementioned weight loss challenge.  It was just one of those very good days.

The week after, we went to Star Wars Day at the Brandywine Zoo, where the kids had a blast meeting all of the characters and checking out the small selection of animals they had.  The Lobster's favorite part was the Rodent of Unusual Size (seriously!) that pooped in its own little pool then swam in it Mommy, so gross, remember that?  I overheard Gobbles telling her girlfriend on the way to swimming And, at the end when they were taking pictures, a stormer trooper married his girlfriend!  Close, we saw someone from the acting troop propose to one of the handlers.  It was cute and the Lobster was completely smitten.  I also thought it was funny that Gobbles, of all the things he saw that day, chose that moment to share with his girlfriend whom, he later told me in all seriousness and secrecy, that he really does have a crush on, even despite her mom and I forcing them to hang out for years and making grand plans for their wedding!.

It's been a spring of ups and downs for us, but we're hanging in there just trying to nab what each day throws at us.  In the next few weeks we have sports makeups (did I mention it's rained almost every Saturday since March), graduations, pool kick off, summer camp, more birthday parties, and a special family vacation as a bucket list trip for our girl Spoons.  We're looking forward to this, our first official trip that is just our little family, and we are thrilled about it.

Some video highlights of the last few months...

6 YEARS!

I started writing this entry a few weeks ago.  I wasn't too wrapped up in the emotion of my boy getting older because I was so wrapped up in other issues as I last posted.  But now that I'm finally giving this a title and all I'm starting to well up.  I remember writing his 6 month letter and it seems like yesterday.  And now we're 1/3 of the way to 18.  PLEASE slow down, time.

Dear Gobbles,

Your 6th birthday came this year amid a flutter of chaos in our house but still you handled it with the grace and maturity of a much older kid.   As always, I am incredibly thankful for that.  Buddy, you seem so grown up right now, only in kindergarten but already my little helper with chores and your sister and just an all around good guy.  When we get home from school you hop out and get the mail, let the dogs out, bring them back in and wipe their paws, feed them, and start your homework.  Sure, you put up a bit of a fight with the homework but I get it, you don't get home til after 6 and you're hungry and tire and it's the last thing you want to do when there's tv to watch and you just want to unwind.  But you're good at it, you breeze through it and I'll just give it a quick check and you're on your way.   Like me, you spend more time fighting over doing it than you spend actually doing it!

School is going well for you, academically I have no worries as you're already interested in math up to multiplication and you're reading all the books school sends home.  The fall has been a bit touch and go with your friends.  You have two bffs you've had since you started in the infant room and I think the rule of 3 is coming in when you guys are deciding what to what to play at recess.  Batman vs Star Wars (you fighting for the latter) between two stubborn kids and the tiebreaker.  You've branched out though and I've heard you talk about other kids you've become friends with.  You also have your girlfriend D who you know I love and your sister is bffs with her sis (and her mom and I get along famously).  You are always so sweet with her, holding her hand and sharing your stuff, even holding doors with her. I love it.  

And speaking of sweet, you have the biggest heart of any 6 year old I know, always drawing pictures for me or making extra airplanes for your sister.  I am so incredibly proud of you for what you decided to do for your birthday party this year.  We found out you could have parties at the local SPCA, so we asked you and of course you jumped all over the idea of having dogs and cats at your party.  I gave you an option of getting presents from your friends like normal or requesting donations (presents for the dogs and cats) instead.  You didn't even hesitate when you said Mommy, the dogs don't even have homes, we need to bring them presents.   Your intentions were so sweet and my heart is still swollen with pride.  Your party ended up being a big success, with other kids loving the animals just as you do.  Despite the offer though, no one went home with any live party favors!

Finally, since I missed the entire fall a few updates on you.
-Your favorite color has shifted from yellow to red because you are a jr sith lord who was emperor palpatine on Halloween and Darth Vader and now Kilo Ren are your heroes.  We saw Star Wars a few days ago and you sat agape the entire show, enthralled for over two hours.  You still have an immense interest in science and planets and all that fun and seem to understand the big picture when we explain things like season change and even day and night.
-You got your report card and of the nearly 90 ranked kindergarten assessments you received 3/3 on all but 3 of them.  You know you're a smart kid but please, always remember to work hard and not give up.
-You've currently changed your career choice from engineer to dog rescuer.  You don't care that Daddy and I told you that wasn't really a "career", because that's what you're going to do.  Yes, you have gotten a bit more argumentative in your old age but if you didn't I'd start to wonder where you came from.
-You already eat like a teenager in terms of quantity and love fruit.  Your palate has recently expanded from just ordering pizza or mac n cheese at restaurants to burgers and more.  You haven't stopped talking about the chicken parm I made for you and you even ate loads of clams Daddy made on New Years Eve.  Keep it up, always be open to new things because you never know what you'll like.
-You may or may not become the next american ninja warrior.  You can climb trees and monkey bars with ease and can maneuver yourself on top of them in ways that I even can't.  Just please be careful up there buddy.

Well my favorite time of the day is almost here - when I pick you guys up from school and you greet me with the best hug and Hi Mommy! in the world, usually followed by Look at this ___ I made today!

I love you more than you'll ever know! (and yes, as you told me when I said this on your birthday Mo-om, you ALWAYS write that....)

Love,
Mommy

You made star wars puppets during after-care one day.  You made your sister
put on a puppet show with you and it was awesome. 

You loved this horse so much you asked if we could get one. 

Yup, that's an adult order. No problem for you. 

A boy and his best friends. 

You do still go back to your old faithfuls.. Make your own pizza? Every. Time. 

Just a leisurely ride through the neighborhood. 

this is you (in the blue) after I told you to NOT go as high.  To me
this is still too high!

A sick day at my work, you made no complaints about doing some math too...

You prefer apple pie (or cookies) to cake...

She loves you so much.  

One of the many things to decorate your mini-adult room.  Others include more posters,
a lightsaber lamp, star wars decals, and a full size bed complete with Star Wars comforter. 

Best birthday party ever.  As you've been told!

A random weeknight with your girlfriend.

Your favorite Santa gift - the Force Push

I forgot to mention what a great helper you are with putting things together.
Here you are taking apart the daybed/crib to move out of your sisters room. 

Legos = awesome!

Day 2 of Christmas break at grandmom's house. yikes!

Day three of Christmas break at work with me.  That day you told one of my
coworkers how funny it was when Spoons jumped on you and it "tickled my wee wee..." yikes again!

Your new old favorite game, chess.

Finally! A seafood eater.  Yummy clams. 

Your New Years' Kiss at midnight!

I have a feeling this will get a lot of use this summer! 

The Pre-K Graduate

Back in June, this happened.

Nope.  He didn't run for president, although it looks that way, he graduated from Pre-K.  My little big man is off to Kindergarten in a month.  I was more tearful than he was at this milestone, likely because he is lucky enough to be hitting K with his two best friends in the world and his girlfriend.  One more year together for this bunch since their parents need full time kindergarten and transitioning twice will be just too much for their poor mothers.

At this milestone, Gobbles stands roughly 46" tall, weighs around 50 lbs, and is 5 1/2 years old.  His favorite color is yellow (followed closely by red and blue, his bffs' faves), favorite foods are mac and cheese, pizza, hot dogs, grilled cheese, pez, m&ms, and teddy grahams.  He eats adult-size portions of everything and we're already clipping grocery coupons for when he's a teenager.   He still wants to be an engineer when he grows up and wants to go to college close enough that he can still live with Mommy (awww).  He prefers T-Ball to soccer but has taken an interest in golf and tennis.  It doesn't even occur to him that swimming is a sport / exercise because he has so much fun I cannot drag him away from the water.  

He is all about Star Wars, Star Wars Rebels, Lego Star Wars, just about anything Star Wars, and just completed watching all 6 installments of the movie.  He knows the background and relationships of the characters better than I do.  Occasionally he gives the galactic empire stuff a rest and relapses into super-hero-dom where Ironman rules followed by Batman and Captain America.  The tried and true Disney favorites that remain on high rotation are Big Hero 6, Wall-E, and the Incredibles.

Gobbles is looking forward to Kindergarten except for the fact that he'll now have to wake up 5 mornings a week, since on my home Fridays now he still sleeps in.  He's started reading simple books to us at bedtime until he gets a little lazy- Mommy can you just finish it?  and I do because I've been told not to push him, and he's exhausted by then anyway.  When he's playing restaurant with his sister he's always interested in writing down the order or making us a shopping list, half spelling the words himself and half asking us for clarification.  Addition and subtraction seem to come naturally to him and we're working on grasping times tables and division (he's always on point when it comes to dividing up food of course!).  My boy has a love for science and hypothesizing as well, correctly guessing outcomes most of the time and learning to be open to other peoples predictions as well.

Although we won't technically be a part of the elementary school yet, I still feel like a milestone has passed in the blink of an eye.  My firstborn is now a school-aged kid with homework and extracurriculars and bus transportation.  I will no longer get a daily report each day telling me what happened, we'll have to pry it out of him at dinner hoping we get better answers than fine, yes, no.  I know everything will work out as normal, but man time flies.  I mean, has it really been over 5 YEARS since I started tracking this kid?  Thank God I did, even if my posts are becoming more scarce.

Because, wow, he's such a little adult now:

Class...

Best buds!

They've been friends for longer than I was in high school...

I think they've already promised prom dates to each other...

One that we'll miss...

So proud of our boy

HEYYY.  DID YOU FORGET SOMETHING?

Boy, no respect for the little siblings!!

Just a touch of a lot of little voices:

Team Players PLUS golf!

It's already time to be signing up for fall sports, so I should probably recap the spring athletics in the Gobbles household.  Both kids started a sport that was new to them, one loved it, the other was darn good but complained that it wasn't dance class more than half the time.  Gobbles also had an opportunity to play golf with the big boys, and based on that outing, he's hooked.  

The Lobster's inaugural soccer season began first in early April.  The weather could have been a little better - from subzero one week to scorching the next and back again- a lot for a bunch of three year olds to handle, but she managed.  After the first week one of her classmates joined us from a later session because my little ray of sunshine was just what he needed to coax him onto the field.  And isn't it always better to have another normal mom to hang out with among the sea of latte-carrying, lululemon wearing yet perfectly groomed moms?  

Anyway, the Lobster took to the field like a natural, enthusiastically participating for the first 15 minutes, then getting bored, then hopping back in it when promised a reward for not giving up.  Seriously though, she's pretty good (I'm sure it's all momma's raw talent, haha).  There were kids over a full year older than her in the group and she managed to steal the ball from them quite a few times throughout the scrimmage sessions.  She had an aggressive heart and vengeance in her eyes whenever she was knocked over, complete with rolling around dramatics followed by a dirty look and a chase to regain possession.  She did get a little pissy when things didn't go her way on the field, and may have cheated once or twice by picking the ball up completely, but she had fun.  She listened to her coaches (most of the time) and showed off for them when they complimented her.  I'm sure this won't be the end of her soccer career, but we do have to take a season or two off to explore this pesky need for dance class... 

I certainly look the part, don't I? 

Doing my toe-taps!

Catch!

Hustle!

Cheese!

Finally some nice weather!

Doesn't everyone play in a skirt? 

Take that, 4-year-old!

My boy!

She's a sassy player, sometimes a cheater, but really pretty darn good for a three year old!

And now onto Mr. Gobbles. After the winter indoor session, Gobbles declared himself over soccer and onto new and different things.  I bought him his first tball glove a few years back after I saw him throwing lefty, as soon as I found a child's lefty glove I snatched it up.  After signing up to be on a team with his bff, Gobbles was eager to get the season started, which finally happened in late April.  Though score and rankings were not kept, this was the first league where he actually had separate practices and games.  There was at least one practice or game occurring on a weeknight with the other on the weekend.  It was a little bit of a rush grabbing the kids from school, feeding a dinner of crackers and fruit in the car, and rushing off to the field after stopping home to let the dogs out, but we managed, and it was probably just a small taste of things to come when they get older.

Anyway, this kid loved every minute of Tball and was actually upset that the games only lasted 3 innings (3 innings with no outs, everyone batting, etc gets to be verrry long).  He managed to weasel his way into playing key positions each game - short stop, pitcher, or one of the bases.  He especially loved first base, which makes me happy because once he gets down catching the ball, a lefty first-baseman is the way to go.  Gobbles took the "ready" position with his hands on knees waiting for the ball with each batter (which position did you play today buddy?  "ready").  In the beginning he was a little overeager, tackling kids on his on team to field the ball, but after a few games and some direction from the coaches, he managed to make plays appropriate for the position he was playing.  I loved watching him swell with pride after completing a play, getting a kid "out", or making it to first after a hit.  Batting was a little tougher for him because he was not used to the tee, so I think he'll actually improve once the tee is out of the picture.

It was a great season having fun with his friend (they somehow managed to get placed near each other on the field a lot, distracting each other once in awhile by shaking their buts at each other or telling inside jokes).  It was also a great time for learning the fundamentals of the game and being a team player in a very individual-focused sport.  Gobbles' choice for team name (The Blue Rockets) won out when the team voted (on the schedule they were just called Team #5), so that was something else he was happy about- it really is the little things.  The season wrapped up mid-June with his grandpop having seen him twice, grandmom, aunts, and uncle all having had a chance to cheer as well, the first of many baseball seasons for my little slugger.

Ready for opening day with my biggest fan!

And ready to make trouble with my bff.

Parading...

Tough guys on the fence...

Cheering for my buddy!

Kickin' the dirt like pitchers do...

hahaha, wiggle your butt at me!

Ok, time to focus!

got it!

Go, gobbles, GO!

Outta here!

The long trek to first~

What a great season!

He has since learned to field with more control, stopped throwing the bat, but still loving every moment:

Somewhere in between all of the t-ball and soccer and other fun we had in the spring, Gobbles managed to get a chance to head out with his grandpop, dad, and uncle to play a real 9 hole round of golf.  My dad and brother-in-law were a little apprehensive about his joining the adults to play, but hubs and I were confident he'd be able to keep up and even enjoy himself.  So out they went on a weekend morning, armed with Gobbles' hand-me-down clubs from my cousin and hubs dusty-haven't-been-used-in-five-years set.  They teed up, drove, and putted to their hearts' content and to the amazement of everyone there, Gobbles did fantastic.  I mentioned to hubs when I watched his videos that the swings were a bit happy gilmore-ish, but he assured me that Gobbles moved the ball accurately and shocked his grandpop and uncle with his skills.  Moreover, Gobbles had a blast and survived two hours on the course plus the driving range.  It makes me happy knowing that no matter what kind of roadblocks and sports he's prevented from playing because of his eyes, he'll always have golf to go back to if nothing else works out.

Ready to golf!

Sorry Cannoli, you can't come :( 

A little bit hockey player...

but it get's the job done!

Yep, i'm like an adult in this golf cart...

I got it on the green!

Precision is key!

Right at the pin!

Just getting some more practice in...

Grandpop thinks we have a tiger woods in the making.  I think he'll at least be able to fake it for business outings when he's older :)